For many years, I’ve been sharing information on the damaging effects of stress and the ameliorating effects of self-care. To sum it up simply: Chronic (prolonged) stress seriously taxes our body, challenges our ability to regulate emotions, strains our relationships and cuts us off from our creativity and spirituality. According to the AIS (American Institute on Stress) The top 4 sources of stress are Money, Relationships, Work and Health Issues. Several studies have shown that that 87-93% of illnesses are stress related.
When I am teaching, I like to ask group members to share what comes to mind when I ask, “what is self-care?”
The top 3 answers are: hygiene, rest, and exercise. These three are truly important, and there is so much more. Self- Care is important and unique to everyone. Below are some ideas to get you thinking. What might you need more of?
Physical Self-Care
Remember to drink plenty of water, get the right amount of rest, and eat nutritious and anti-inflammatory foods. Put your bare feet on the Earth, get some sunshine, practice deep breathing, and enjoy moderate and fun exercise. Take the right supplements or proper medications for your unique health care needs.
I love the following nursery rhyme: The best six doctors anywhere- And no one can deny it- Are sunshine, water, rest, and air, exercise and diet- These six will gladly you attend- If only you are willing- Your mind they’ll ease- Your will they’ll mend and charge you not a shilling.
Mental/Emotional Self-Care
Think positive thoughts and engage in encouraging self-talk. Be your best friend rather than your worst enemy. Notice your emotions and be curious about what they are communicating to you. Work with a therapist to heal past trauma, process grief, or heal family of origin issues.
Honestly address any addictions that are causing negative consequences to your health, relationships, work, and self-esteem. Learn healthy communication skills as well as healthy skills to decrease and regulate painful emotions.
Social Support/Belonging
Whether you are an introvert (you get energized when you are alone) or an extrovert (you get energized when you are with people) we all need people in our lives that care about us. Enjoy more time with supportive and inspiring family and friends. Spend less time with negative and draining personalities. Limit or end toxic relationships.
Join a spiritual group, 12-step support group or meet-up group that interests you. Meet with a therapist, get a sponsor, seek out a mentor or volunteer with a cause you are passionate about.
Spiritual Self-Care
Every once in a while, while offering information about stress, someone has said to me, “Melissa, I don’t have any stress.” This annoyed me initially (because, come on, we are all stressed out, aren’t we?) but I quickly became curious and started asking those people, “What is your secret?” Over the years, the answers have all been reports of a spiritual practice. “I pray, I take a long mindful walk every day, I go to church, I trust my higher power, I meditate,” are the type of reports I hear from the ones that claim to be stress-free.
Think about how you experience your personal sense of spiritual connection, your own personal experience that brings you peace and a sense of being connected to something larger than yourself. Find meaning and contemplate your purpose.
Lifestyle Choices
Structure your routine so it works for you, set some exciting and realistic goals, try to enjoy hobbies and leisure time, spend time in nature, or find other fulfilling ways to spend your time.
This area of self-care can be the most challenging for many of us, especially when we are in the mist of financial, work, relationship, or health issues. Making time to play and have some fun doesn’t usually make it on the to-do list, but please know that it’s important to spend some time doing something just for the fun of it, remembering it doesn’t have to be anything sensational, just something that makes you happy.
“When you recover or discover something that nourishes your soul and brings joy, care enough about yourself to make room for it in your life.” – Jean Shinoda Bolen
